Tell Me Everything

A story about being right where you are supposed to be...

I have some things going on with my health that I am not quite ready to talk about, except to share that the last week has been exhausting. Emotionally, mentally, physically. So, it was sort of a blessing in disguise that my doctor suggested that I not travel this next week.

We had planned a family road trip that would begin this weekend with a birthday party in Pensacola for Chris’s grandmother’s 90th birthday. Then we were going to spend the next week in New Orleans. But as Wednesdays doctors appointments turned into Thursdays doctors appointments which turned into Friday’s lab work, it was clear that even without a doctor recommendation, it would have been tough for me to be fully engaged and present in a vacation right now.

Enjoy these pictures of how I spent my weekend by myself. Lots of Pride and Prejudice. Lots of cookies.

Chris took the kids up to Pensacola on Friday and as I type this on Sunday afternoon, they are driving home and should be here by dinner tonight.

I was really bummed at first about not going. I’ve already taken the time off work and I had a great trip planned. More than that, I was really looking forward to spending time with our family. So, I did a good deal of moping around all weekend, if I’m honest. I really only had one thing I wanted to do this weekend while I was here by myself. I wanted to go to church.

Y’all know that I love Jesus and I’m involved in so much in our church, but I’m not usually at the services (mostly because Gracie and I have a 4-year-old Sunday school class at the same time). But this week wasn’t our week to teach and I felt that familiar call to church that I get every now and then. Especially when things are hard.

I found a seat in my usual areas (center right aisle, 3/4 of the way back, thankyouverymuch) and was just settling in for the service to start when I caught the eye of one of my neighbors a few rows in front of me. We have been trying without success to get together for a few weeks now, so seeing that she was by herself, too, I mimed to her that I was coming up to sit with her.

The minute I sat down, she turned to me with huge tears in her eyes and said, “This is my first time at church since my son has gone away to college. I’m so glad you are sitting with me.”

I teared up, took her hand and said, “I’m having some health problems and I’m scared. I’m so glad you are sitting with me.”

We held hands the whole service while we sang and worshipped and listened to a message on (…wait for it…) being there for others. I’m not even kidding.

During the offering, she whispered, “Breakfast after?”

“Absolutely,” I whispered back.

And so we went to breakfast across the street afterwards. I listened to her share about her newly emptied nest and I looked at all of her pictures from the weekend they dropped her son off and we cried together over how old he suddenly looked.

And then she listened to me share about all my doctors appointments and testing and next steps and worst fears and everything in between and we cried some more.

For two hours we caught up and by the time we left the restaurant, we both had red eyes and splotchy cheeks and felt about 1,000 pounds lighter.

Last week, I listened to a podcast that reminded listeners to truly be present when they were needed. When a friend or a child or a partner or a neighbor needs someone to sit with them in their worry or sadness or fear or joy, to use the sentence, “Tell me everything.” That phrase signals that you are giving your loved one your full attention. Leave no detail unshared. Nothing is too insignificant. I’m in this with you. Tell me everything. What a gift!

So how beautiful was it that when we sat down in the cafe booth this morning, the first thing she said to me was, “Tell me everything, friend.”